Leave Britain Immediately

Diary, 27th May 2023

IT is no longer enough to abandon Britain; one must take revenge on it by funnelling money out of its economy and investing it in another. I am told that several countries on the continent have opened up a “digital nomad” scheme, which permits remote-working Britons to move there with the general concessions of lower taxes, accommodation, and state-appointed, olive-skinned mediterranean wives. The news that Britain is one of the least functional countries in Europe, with the poorest-educated and laziest workers, has obviously not reached the continent yet. I would advise the reader to take advantage of this generous scheme while he still can.